Single to MARRIED in 4 months... The prayer that brought me my husband... right to my backyard!

by Jennifer Fennema August 31, 2025

I sure hope you have a cup of coffee and you're sitting in a comfy chair, because this love story is wild!

Let's start with the prayer that I prayed back in September of 2024.

I had heard on a podcast. I can't recall which one, cause I listen to a couple a day, but the speaker suggested I write out a prayer to God, with all my must-haves in a man. Creating the perfect man for me. To not leave ANYTHING out, as he is a God of even BIGGER dreams than those I could dream up.

So I did! I wrote it all out in my keepsake prayer journal. A journal I created to pass down to my girls, that records all the miracles that God has done in my life... well, starting in 2020 or so. One, they can look at when I'm long gone to see how God moved in my life, to inspire them to always seek him in all that they do.

I started the prayer like this,

"Father, I give you all control in my life. I look forward to the life you have planned for me, and I pray that in your timing, you reveal the perfect man for me."

I learned in 2023 that once I actually learned to TRUST GOD, not to do things "My way" anymore and seek HIS WILL, he made things happen! It's almost like I heard him saying

"Finally, child! You're understanding how this works. Now, I'm able to move mountains."

I shamefully admit, this unfortunately took me a while to learn as a Christian. At the time, it was a scary prayer. Looking back, not so much. I wish I had done it sooner. Part of the reason I'm sharing this story is to possibly inspire you, for you to also humble yourself and hand it all over to God. Now, I pray this all this time. "Lord, your will be done" because I truly don't want to do it my way anymore, my way stinks! So why not do the same thing in looking for the perfect man for me?

I had no clue that after writing this prayer, God would act so quickly!!! Like, I'm talking 2 MONTHS quickly!!!

I continued to write...

"A man that will put YOU first. One that loves to hold my hand, cuddle and of course enjoys spending time in the word. A man that will pray with and over me, one that will love and honour me. That will love and respect my girls."

COOL FACT: Ben made my engagement ring and our wedding bands.

I wanted to make sure that above all else, he puts God before me! Some may not understand this, but to live a life with Jesus, we have to make sure He is our true love. That I am His bride first. When we build a life on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ, we build a life on SOLID GROUND. Storms may come and storms may go, but they will never sweep away Gods tremendous love for us. In asking for a man who would do so, I knew that in any situation he would seek Gods council in prayer, asking for wisdom. If a couple applies this to their everyday life, their marriage is sure to succeed and flourish.

I also wanted a man who LOVED to cuddle as much as I do. There is nothing like being in the arms of a man who deeply loves you and wants to hold you close! Okay, maybe one other thing that trumps it... A man who prays over you! Ben makes this a priority twice a day. Before his feet even hit the floor, with his left arm under my head, and his right arm embracing me, Song of Solomon 8:3 Ben prays over me, for us and our family. This means the world to me, and it's one of the biggest prayers God answered for me. Not only does Ben try to do this every day, but he also repeats this as we lie our heads down for the night. This leaves very little room for the enemy to attack our marriage when my husband is covering me and our family in prayer morning and night. We have learned that when the enemy is attacking, it's tough for Ben to pray those nights. Learning when the enemy is attacking in your own life is actually a gift, and something I think that's developed over time and with a larger understanding of the spiritual war at work. We just need to be humble, reach out to the Holy Spirit, and have him lead us in prayer instead. Don't be fooled, the war in the spiritual realm is 24/7. Your Kingdom come, your will be done. I'm so thankful for Ben and the powerful name of Jesus Christ, that through the POWERFUL NAME OF JESUS CHRIST, we can win the war against the enemy. So partner together with your husband, put on the Armor of God, and wage war against the enemy.

My mom raised me with a lot of love and affection. As a little girl, she would gently tickle my back and give me head rubs while cuddling me to sleep. I, in turn, did the same thing with my girls. It's honestly my off button. If I'm mid-sentence, I will stop talking and melt into a pile of mush if someone starts rubbing my back. I did not want it to seem like a burden to my husband if I dared ask for a back tickle or head rub. I wanted him to love providing for me that way, an action of love, not sacrifice. Yep, back tickles and head rubs are my love language

My request did not stop there...

"I need a man strong in his faith, Lord, and one that wants to do right by you. A hard-working man who loves animals and wants a homestead of our own."

If he didn't have strong faith, he was not for me! There have been so many occasions that through my own faith, God opened doors, built bridges, and lit a path for me. I wanted a man who had the mustard seed kind of faith! A man who would dream BIG and had the Faith to back it, that with our GOD, such miraculous events are possible.

Jesus said to them,

Loves Animals, this was actually underlined three times! I’ve had animals my entire life! No joke! My parents even had a hobby farm when I was a little toddler. My mom also invested in a few dairy goats to milk, as I was lactose intolerant. The life I dreamed of was filled with animals, pretty much taking me back to my roots as a little girl on my parents' hobby farm. I wanted a hobby farm. I know, I have a little hobby farm now, but the dream is to add a jersey cow, possibly some sheep, and some highlands. So, needless to say, I did NOT want a man who would bear a grudge for the work involved in owning animals of any kind. It just so happens... Ben had already owned chickens, and due to his incredible upbringing was already proficient in not only processing chickens but a multitude of game. He also owns the sweetest little Heeler named Sig. That sure checked off a few boxes!!!

” I want a man that yearns to be by my side but also strong enough to be by himself too.”

I wanted a partner in life, a best friend... You know, someone to do life with! My girls are in high school, and it won't be long until they are off living the life God has called them to do. When that happens, I want to be able to come home to my best friend. To sit down and share a cup of coffee together, read scripture together, and share the gospel with others. To go on adventures together and to build our dream homestead together. To lay down at night and be held in his arms.

When I prayed, “Strong enough to be by himself too.” I was trying to convey a man who was not needy. Strong and confident in who he was, enabling him to have guy time or not get jealous if I was with my girlfriends. A happy balance!

Ben is that man! Truth be told, he has told me that he might have a small addiction to me, and I have NO problem with that! The love this Man has for me is OFF THE CHARTS, more on that a little later in the prayer. We love being in each other's company and complement each other so well. Again... all by God's divine intervention!!!

”A man who loves horses and your land”

Pretty sure you can tell by the photo that Ben loves horses. He actually has a way with all animals! Like a real-life Ace Ventura, they just flock to him. I was raised to take note of how the family dogs react to new people in your home. They have a very good sense of character, and Ben won them all over, even the parrot! That was another check box, as all my animals just adored him.

This next part of my prayer was crucial...

”A family man. One Blessed By You so we can show my or our kids what true love Ordained by God truly looks like.”

I come from a broken home, and unfortunately, so do my kids. I want them to be able to witness what a marriage built on Christ looks like. I want them to see us in a random, comforting embrace in the middle of the house, just sharing our love. I think it's so important for children to grow up seeing that as "normal everyday life." My prayer is that our marriage inspires our kids to seek out the same kind of love and relationship we have in their future spouse. To seek a partner in the Christian faith, one that will lay down his life for them and treat them with the utmost respect as the precious Daugthers of the MOST HIGH KING!

I'm so incredibly grateful for Ben's Christian upbringing! He has retained scripture like a sponge and, with the help of the Holy Spirit, will recite the perfect verse that corresponds with what we are walking through. This gift was a huge part of my attraction to Ben. He not only knew the scriptures, but he also followed the word of God and obeyed them. That's the kind of man I was willing to marry and to help raise my teenage girls.

I ended the prayer with this...

”I know Lord that this man exists as this woman has too much love inside her not to share, Thank you Lord."

I had this placed upon my heart for quite some time. I knew God had someone for me because I just had an enormous amount of love inside of me that I felt like I needed to pour out. I can't even explain it properly. Only God truly knows. This was the kicker, though...

The moment I knew God was up to something... Ben had stopped in to pick up a planner for his sister as a hostess gift. He brought his adorable son Zach with him, and he was so well-behaved. Zach sat snuggled into Ben's lap while we were all engaged in conversation. My mom was there also, as she was visiting. There is a particular moment in that conversation that is frozen in time for me. Mom and Ben are talking about relationships, and I'm sitting to the left of Ben in the rocking chair that I rocked my girls in when they were babies. It's a good thing I was sitting down because if I were standing, I probably would have fallen over! He says, "I just feel like I have so much love inside of me to give someone." I wish I could have seen my face, cause I really tried to hide it. That was the moment I knew God was up to something!

That is exactly how I ended my prayer,

but this is exactly how God started our love story.

I bet you want to know HOW God brought Ben right to my backyard! Well, stay tuned for that one, cause that's a whole other rabbit hole, and another cup of coffee!